What's in a crush?
We may not all be writers, but we are all storytellers?
We all have crushes, don't we? We have Man Crush Mondays and Women Crush Wednesdays, and more often than not, these crushes are on people who we've never spoken to or fictional characters. They would be someone from a book you've just read, from a TV show or from a movie. I somehow have a new one every day, but when it comes to having relationships, well I'm a little bit of a novice.
I have always wondered why that was. Why was it so easy to like someone so much just by looking at them on screen or reading about them in a book, but when it comes to real life, love is the toughest thing to come by.
Here's the thing about crushes, with crushes you don't have to wait for the other shoe to drop. In a book, you're reading about your character, you know his nuances (I am going to be talking about the male species here, but I think this would be generic regardless of gender). You know his demons, you understand early on where he's coming from, where his power comes from. You're well aware of his feelings. That, in real life, is extremely difficult to come by.
When you fall in love with someone in a movie, they're in that moment as clear as glass. You see them, you understand them, you feel like you know them and, in that moment you do. Another thing? They express their emotions with the greatest amount of ease. They cry when they're sad, they dance when they're happy and they break things when they're angry. You don't have to sit around trying to understand their emotions, or trying to figure out what it is they feel about you.
A person you've never gotten to know, is easier to like. They're not a part of your life, you don't have to deal with your demons or theirs. You make up a short story in your head. You disregard every thing else and only focus on the qualities that you like. Makes you wonder if this could be applied to real life, doesn't it?
Why are crushes so easy to have and to forget? Because they're unattainable. You want someone like them in your lives, but they probably aren't ever going to be, hence it is easy. When you want someone in your life, there are a lot of other things that come into play. There are emotions that they don't express, there are conversations you avoid and they don't come with a guidebook to their demons.
Crushes give you a checklist that you think you might want, but the people you finally decide to let in? Crush that checklist to the ground, because they are what you need.
We all have crushes, don't we? We have Man Crush Mondays and Women Crush Wednesdays, and more often than not, these crushes are on people who we've never spoken to or fictional characters. They would be someone from a book you've just read, from a TV show or from a movie. I somehow have a new one every day, but when it comes to having relationships, well I'm a little bit of a novice.
I have always wondered why that was. Why was it so easy to like someone so much just by looking at them on screen or reading about them in a book, but when it comes to real life, love is the toughest thing to come by.
Here's the thing about crushes, with crushes you don't have to wait for the other shoe to drop. In a book, you're reading about your character, you know his nuances (I am going to be talking about the male species here, but I think this would be generic regardless of gender). You know his demons, you understand early on where he's coming from, where his power comes from. You're well aware of his feelings. That, in real life, is extremely difficult to come by.
When you fall in love with someone in a movie, they're in that moment as clear as glass. You see them, you understand them, you feel like you know them and, in that moment you do. Another thing? They express their emotions with the greatest amount of ease. They cry when they're sad, they dance when they're happy and they break things when they're angry. You don't have to sit around trying to understand their emotions, or trying to figure out what it is they feel about you.
A person you've never gotten to know, is easier to like. They're not a part of your life, you don't have to deal with your demons or theirs. You make up a short story in your head. You disregard every thing else and only focus on the qualities that you like. Makes you wonder if this could be applied to real life, doesn't it?
Why are crushes so easy to have and to forget? Because they're unattainable. You want someone like them in your lives, but they probably aren't ever going to be, hence it is easy. When you want someone in your life, there are a lot of other things that come into play. There are emotions that they don't express, there are conversations you avoid and they don't come with a guidebook to their demons.
Crushes give you a checklist that you think you might want, but the people you finally decide to let in? Crush that checklist to the ground, because they are what you need.
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