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CONFESSIONS OF AN INTROVERT (WHO DOESN'T LOOK LIKE ONE!)

1. I hate the generalizations made when I say I am an introvert
“A weird, socially awkward person we all want to avoid.” 
To me, an “introvert” is someone who is selective about who they surround themselves with. It’s someone who is comfortable with being by themselves without feeling insecure. I value quality over quantity. That does not mean I will be a sulking loner in some corner at a party, I will be talking and mingling, just not with everybody, not all at once and not all evening.

2. I love meeting new people, but only if they approach me first.
If I have to make the first move, it’ll most likely never happen. I’m silently imagining every possible thing that could go wrong. Even after giving myself a thousand odd pep talks, there is a small chance that it will ever happen. By the time I even work up the courage to talk to someone new, I’ve thoroughly freaked them out by constantly glancing their way and they've already sprinted for the door.

3. Small Talk for me is not Small Talk to a normal person.
Small talk makes me nervous. I'd rather be alone and not talk at all than make small talk. I'd rather have a deep conversation with someone. I suck at small talk, hence I am usually quiet!

4. We have a heightened sense for a fake or insincere personality.
Our quiet and reserved nature allows us so much time to observe. I see your fake smile and can tell you just lied to that person. I hear you repeat the same exact joke to every single person you run into. I’m onto you, extrovert.

5. Dear Hair Dresser: Please don’t make me talk the entire time I’m in your chair.
I’m sure you’re a very nice and interesting person, but after a certain point, I simply run out of things to talk to you about. I’m out of witty comments. I can’t think of any more normal questions to ask you. And my stupid comments will begin to emerge.

6. My ideal Friday night is watching my fave movies ALL BY MYSELF! (or dining with family)
I don’t want to exhaust myself by socializing with dozens of other people. Can’t I just throw on some sweatpants, make an ice cream run, and sit on the couch?

7. Please never make me to go a club.
What is clubbing even? Why would we go somewhere where it’s so loud I can’t even hear you? Also around so many unknown people unconsciously rubbing up against one another. I’ll be in the quiet corner trying to engage in meaningful conversation with the other introverts if you need me.

8. Networking events = death.
There is literally nothing I hate more than having to meet new people in an environment specifically created for that purpose. I realize that’s entirely the point of networking events, but I feel so much pressure to make myself sound and look like the most interesting person you’ve ever met. I can only be charming for so long! Pass me a glass of wine and let me mentally prepare myself for this first.

9. If I say something stupid, kindly pretend I said nothing at all.
Rest assured knowing that my dumb comment/question will haunt me for the rest of my life. I’ll lie awake at night replaying the entire conversation in my head. I’ll think of a million other things I could have said instead. I’ll vow never to speak again! This is where my quietness comes from. It’s a vicious cycle

10. I am not some "weird loner festering in my own silence" type of a person 
Socializing is an exhausting thing for me. That does not mean that I do not socialize. I just take intervals in between. I am a loner but not because I am highly depressed or I hate people. I am a loner because I love my own company. I can do what I want, say what I want, read or eat what I want and I don't even have to wear pants. I don't look like an introvert on the outside because of the work I have put in to my personality. With regular breaks and time with myself, I am always ready to have fun.

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1 comments:

  1. I resonate with the sentiment of the post. Its interesting for me to see how often introverts are confused with "psychopaths". I have no hesitation in willingly admitting that I'm an introvert, and that makes me an awesome person.

    I don't understand frivolous conversation. If I am putting an effort to have a conversation with you, that means I'm thinking, i'm trying to understand your view point, trying to come up with points to counter you, so that you have a better experience from a conversation. If I talk about the weather, I'd like to share my views on climate change, not meaninglessly have a conversation about tropospherical precipitation and temperature. ( Aside: It has been kinda cold lately)

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