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An ode to friendship…

So, here is what I figured. Friendships are usually just like any other romantic relationship, sometimes, even more serious. I guess the only notable difference that I can manage to see is that you can have more than one at a time without being branded with the infidelity stamp.

You are committed to this person as much, there is an understanding, you need to give it time and sometimes there is one person who is more invested in the friendship than the other. Failure to do one or all of the above things, and you kind of grow apart. You wont have a breakup, nor will it always end with a fight. Sometimes, you just move away, in different directions and life sort of takes its course and fills the void up.

But here is another view, what if one person is more passionate about the friendship. Then there are times when this growing apart becomes easy for one and painful for the other. Coming back to the understanding that if a friendship is like a romantic relationships, one person is moving on while the other is left pining for their attention.

Also, here is another idea. Just like fairytale romances, that you grow out of as soon as reality hits you, friendships also have this stage. In school, you have these friends who are like your whole and sole reason to live, they understand you, they make sure you know that your crush secretly likes you and also that you don’t get into trouble, atleast alone. They are your best friends forever, you know you are going to go grow old with them. You see your future, you even talk about how it will all work out. Sometimes, these friendships last, just like a childhood romance or a high school sweetheart love story. But, most of the times you again grow out of this idea, and by the time that you get to my age you have school friends, college friends, dance class friends, coffee buddies, office pals, and many more. These people know parts of you, small parts. The concept of “best friend forever” sort of takes a back seat, you now start using terms like acquaintances, close friend, friend, work buddy, gym pal, etc.

If you are lucky you have still held on to a few of those old buddies to keep you sane through all of this. These buddies who you can turn back to when shit hits the fan (excuse the expression). But then there are also a few of those close ones that have grown apart and away, and somehow the void has been filled without you realizing it. Those people become just a memory, a distant wish every holiday, someone who you keep making pseudo plans with knowing very well that they probably wont happen. Slowly, they become strangers.

So, here I am again, telling you that friendships are just like any other romantic relationship. It needs work, effort and a little bit of trust. It needs two people who even if are poles apart, are willing to manage to come to the equator once in a while and visit the other poles once in a while.

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