Monday, March 9, 2015

A guy’s girl in a feminist world

I am a girl.
A partially feminine girl.
I have well maintained and manicured nails.
I have really good hair.
I use mascara.
I have a feminine voice.
I am a woman.
I cry while I watch romantic movies, but I do not like mush around me.
I am a guy’s girl.
I am a part of the man’s world.
I am more comfortable around men.
I love Marvel Comics.
I would love to be a decepticon.
I am Iron-man.
I am a hugger, but I do not like unknown people coming into my personal bubble.
I am confused, but I know what I want.
I am a woman who cannot stand other women; my female friends can be counted on one hand.
I do not hang out with the men because it is less drama, if anyone hangs out with men as much as I do, they should know that men are even more dramatic.

With the world becoming what it is, with the news being what it is, the men involved are being bashed up, as they should. But I just wanted to write something positive for the poor ones who are not rapists, here's to the nice and the not so nice and the closet feminist guys who are beating themselves up because of their breed.  
The thing is, there is this wave of feminism doing the rounds. There are women all around wanting to be treated better, they want to be equal with the men, and they are. They do not like being demeaned in any way, and I understand that. The thing also is, that my poor male compadres have gotten the shorter end of the stick. We are so confused about feminism that we have confused the poor men. Now mistake not I have my self respect in place and I believe in feminism, but not as the unfair sham it has become today.

Feminism is not about male bashing., it isn’t about hating the male population, it is about holding your own in any world. It isn’t about confusion, it is about knowing who you are and what you are capable off. Many people have written about how women want to be treated as equals but they also want and expect chivalry. Honestly, I do too. But I remember one very important thing, we are equals and in our own way superior, same goes for the men. The men and women equilibrium is supposed to be a ying and yang spectrum, a complete circle with the best of both worlds.

Yes this is a male dominated society, but I have been lucky to be surrounded by these beautiful men who support and nurture me. They treat me as their equal, as their ‘bro’. But here is what I give them in return, I am not confused about who they are or what they do. They do not stand up if I have to go to the loo. They do not pull the chair out for me all the time, they do it sometimes but not all the time. They do not always pay for me and even if they do, they will let me pay if I put up a fight. They are nice to me, but they beat me up. They protect me, but pull me down when I am doing something silly. Some of them might be romantically interested in me, but they never make me feel awkward about it.

I am one of the boys because despite their egos they know how to be friends. They are intimidated by you, but instead of secretly pulling you down they say it to your face. They make sure you know when you are being too much of a show off. They know how to take a joke even if it is a crass insult. They also know and respect that there is a thin line that you do not cross when you are friends with a woman, no matter what. They understand your moods and do not pester you when you are down, yes that includes PMS. They do not know any remedies but they just know you have to be around. They are protective but they don’t hound you, they understand that you can make your own judgements. Yes, you have to mother them sometimes, but you have to do that with the women too. They are dramatic, they fight too, they obsess about their looks as well, but everything goes with a pinch of salt.

Most important of all, they don’t give you mush, but you still find genuine care in what they don’t say. They wont “baby I love you” all the time, nor will they send hearts, but even when they message you during the day with an expletive, you feel good. And I will say it again for good measure; they understand friendship better than I do.

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